Able to Trust


Another area that is very difficult for many of us to overcome in learning to be a daughter is the area of learning to trust the Heavenly Father. I mean, if the word “father” makes us nervous, than the word “trust” can give us a panic attack. I know this has been true for me for a long time.

Again, my issues went back to the fact that I struggled to believe that the Heavenly Father was trustworthy because my earthly Dad was not.

Growing up, I learned at a very early age that the only thing I could really rely on my Dad for was to do what was best for him. (Just keeping it real)

When there was an issue that had to be resolved, he would usually take the other person’s side and leave my Mom or brother or I hanging so that the other person wouldn’t think badly of him. Even though I could always count on my Mom to defend us, when it came to my Dad, I knew I was on my own.

When it came to providing, my Dad did have a good job and we basically had everything we needed, but one of methods of control that he used to keep everyone under his thumb was that there was always an insecurity about money. My Mom was always afraid we’d lose everything because my Dad filled her with fear. Growing up, there was an insecurity about money hanging over the house and we were told if we wanted extra things or what our friends had we had to earn it and provide for ourselves. (While this isn’t always a bad lesson, in this case it was more control than a teachable moment as it also applied to my Mom)

When my Dad’s secrets were ultimately revealed and we found out that he had serious issues with lying throughout our lives, it rocks your ability to trust.

All of these things combined with other areas of my Dad’s abuse left me having a very difficult time trusting God, relying on Him to come through for me, and honestly, with the idea that I had to take care of myself and provide for myself.

Thankfully, God in His loving concern more for even my spiritual and emotional well-being than my physical well-being didn’t want me to go through life being handicapped by the damage my Father had caused. He placed me in situations where I had to learn to rely on Him to provide.

Keeping it real, this was HARD!! There were times when my “walk of faith” resembled more of a struggle for me to let go of control and trust that God would take care of things while I held my breath and breathed into a bag.

But I can honestly stand before you today and say that throughout my journey I have learned that my Heavenly Father is trustworthy.

I don’t just believe that “My God shall supply all of my needs” because I learned this verse in Sunday School but I believe it and know it to be true because I’ve seen God miraculously provide in situations that there was just absolutely no other way but Him. I’ve seen Him not only provide what was necessary but even what was beyond necessary and in every miracle I’ve learned that I can count on Him.

Obviously, I’m not negating the necessity for financial responsibility and hard work, because these things are important. But what I’ve learned in my own life is that after I’ve done all that I can do and been as faithful as I can be with our finances, I can trust my Heavenly Father to step in and provide because He is trustworthy.

Even more, along my journey I’ve learned that beyond finances I can trust God to be do what I best for me.

I’ve learned that God is on the side of His children.

As Scripture says, He is working together all things for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.

As I said, this has been a journey for me, and continues to be a journey.

This last point isn’t really something that I learned in the distant past of my twenties, but more recently I found myself in a situation where someone was coming against us and I simply did not see a way out. I’d taken an honest look at the situation and even discussed it with a few close friends and we truly did not see where we had done anything wrong other than being deceived by someone who put up a really good front before revealing their true colors.

Suddenly we were faced with a situation that had the potential at the least to lose a significant amount of money, and at the worst, I feared what a lying tongue could do to my reputation which as a minister is pretty important.

For literally months we prayed about this situation, and then it got worse. I honestly, didn’t know what I was going to do.

Even though there were only a handful of people who knew the situation I remember one godly woman saying, “You are a child of God….God is Your Father….and He will take care of this.”

As she paid a powerful prayer….I just cried.

I remember later on being alone in my room in prayer, just laying it all out before God and saying,

“I honestly do not know what to do.

I don’t know how to fix this and I don’t see anyway that You can fix this.

But what I do know is that I can trust you.

I know that You are perfect

I know that You love me.

I know that even if the worst happens, you are trustworthy and you will bring something good from this situation.

So I leave this whole situation in Your hands and trust that You are My Father and You will do what is best.”

Trusting in my Father, I truly laid everything at the altar believing and hoping that he was trustworthy.

I wish I could say that I got up from that prayer and everything was better.

Instead, six weeks past and then the phone rang.

In a way that only God could arrange, the issue was resolved. Someone who had no idea the problem existed made a seemingly unrelated decision that eliminated the problem. Suddenly we were protected and placed in a position where no weapon formed against us would prosper and no waging tongue could stand. Even financially, we did not lose the money I thought was gone.

Besides just feeling shocked and awed, in that moment the most overwhelming thing that I felt was loved.

Protected.

Provided for.

I felt so safe in the arms of my Heavenly Father who came to my rescue, provided my need, and delivered me from an enemy who wanted to cause destruction.

Ladies, that’s our Heavenly Father.

He is a good father that we can trust.

He is there for us and wants to come to our rescue.

He wants to be our provider, our protector, and our guide through life.

He wants what is best for us and works all things together for the good of His daughters so that we can fulfill His purpose in His kingdom.

He truly is a good good Father that we can trust with every part of our lives.

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