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Why I Don't Care if the Bachelor is a Virgin

It was New Year's Eve and I was cozy and warm inside in my pajamas. From my comfy couch, I watching people stand in the pouring rain in Times Square. (I’m sorry, but at my age, that just does not look like fun.). As I was flipping through the channels, one of the interviewers started interviewing a handsome young man. Apparently, he is the new Bachelor—only this season has a twist. The bachelor is a virgin. Right away I thought, “Oh, here we go again.” Because I’ve been down this road before. Someone on a popular television show agrees with a Christian value and the whole Christian community goes gaga over their new spokesman. Only in this instance, there’s a problem. It doesn’t matter if the bachelor is a virgin. He’s still appearing on a show that is nothing more than soft core pornography. As followers of Christ, no Christian should be watching the Bachelor (or the Bachelorette). How can I make that statement when I have never watched the show? Well, the answer was found when the interviewer asked the new bachelor how his virginity would affect the new season, especially what they called the “fantasy suite”. His answers, along with their innuendo, made it clear that this element was designed to be pornography for women. “Oh, c’mon Adessa, that’s taking it a little far—-it’s just a tv show—a popular one at that!” Let me ask you this question: Would you accept that same answer from a man who was looking at pornography on a computer or reading a pornographic magazine? (I mean, they are pretty popular, too.) Obviously not! Yet somehow women have bought into the lie that the standards we apply to Christian men do not apply to women. But just like the lie that Satan told Eve in the Garden of Eden, the results of trusting twisted truths are destructive to our spiritual, emotional and even physical selves. That’s why it’s important that as Christ followers we need to hold ourselves to a higher standard. Rather than indulging in whatever is popular in our culture or makes us feel good when we watch it, we need to evaluate our entertainment choices according to Biblical standards. In this instance the Bible is clear: Ephesians 5:3-12 says: Let there be no sexual immorality, impurity, or greed among you. Such sins have no place among God’s people.

Obscene stories, foolish talk, and coarse jokes—these are not for you. Instead, let there be thankfulness to God.

You can be sure that no immoral, impure, or greedy person will inherit the Kingdom of Christ and of God. For a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world.

Don’t be fooled by those who try to excuse these sins, for the anger of God will fall on all who disobey him. Don’t participate in the things these people do.

For once you were full of darkness, but now you have light from the Lord. So live as people of light! For this light within you produces only what is good and right and true.

Carefully determine what pleases the Lord. Take no part in the worthless deeds of evil and darkness; instead, expose them.

It is shameful even to talk about the things that ungodly people do in secret. Notice that these verses are not suggestions or helpful guidelines, rather they are commands for how followers of Christ are supposed to live.

--We are to avoid sexual immorality and impurity, including obscene stories and coarse jokes.

--We’re not to make excuses for sin, but rather refuse to participate in it.

--We aren’t even supposed to talk about the things that ungodly people do, let alone invite them into our living room and watch as they distort and disobey God’s plans for relationships and sex.

--Perhaps most importantly, we are to evaluate each part of our lives and “carefully determine what pleases the Lord.”

If a television show or movie or video or even a book don’t align with the principles of God’s Word, then we shouldn’t be watching it.

That’s why it doesn’t matter if this season’s Bachelor is a virgin. The entire show is against God’s principles for sexual conduct, for how men and women are to interact and treat each other, and how a solid relationship is built.

For a Christ follower, watching this show is no different than drinking poison. It may not seem dangerous while you are consuming it, but ultimately it will damage your mind, your heart, your emotions, and your relationship with God.

That is not what I want for you. Instead, I want you to be strong, healthy, and experience all that God has for your life. Unfortunately, this cannot happen if we choose to continue indulging in entertainment that is sinful.

So what do you do if you are a fan of the Bachelor?

Stop watching it.

Ask God to forgive you for sinning intentionally (if you knew it was wrong and did it anyway) or unintentionally (if you didn’t that it was against God’s Word until now). Then the next time it is on, don’t watch.

It really is that simple. I know, because recently we were watching a show that we really liked. We were really into the plot line and looked forward to it each week. And then one week it took a radical turn against Biblical principles. Knowing we had a choice between obeying God and watching this show we stopped watching it.

You can do the same thing. You, too, can decide that it doesn’t matter if the Bachelor (or Bachelorette) is a virgin, or a Christian, or even claims to be a spirit-filled born again Christian. As long as the show continues to disobey Biblical standards regarding relationships, honoring each other, and sexual conduct, then followers of Jesus have no business watching it.

Spoken in Love,


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